Quite simply, a rant.

[Warpblade]

I'm writing about the stories posted here.

First of all, a chapter shouldn't be about the length of one page in Microsoft Word. Double spaced. Far too many people write chapters that are far too short, and while they don't need to be thesis-length, there needs to be some level of depth to them. A chapter should be more than just a battle - it should include things such as character or storyline development.

Second, enough with the prophetic prologues. If it can be tied to story properly, then it works, but an all-too-common sight is a prophecy that has a bit to do with the story, but is never mentioned again.

Third, not every story needs to start with a battle. Some stories are written specifically about one battle - that's fine, but even in "Last Stand" (by Pureauthor), despite the setting of the battle for Mt. Hyjal, it starts with the time before the battle, and the author manages to include character development that is more thoughtfully done than the standard, "they were marching somewhere and suddenly lots of ______ attacked."

Fourth, every culture seems to be the same. A possible solution - try giving a little variety by giving different cultures various names for certain things. For example, when describing a Roman army, instead of saying "spears" and "throwing spears," one could say "hasta" and "pila." "Gladius" is far better than "short thrusting sword."

Fifth - believe it or not, it IS possible for a female character to exist and not fall in love with one of the main characters.

Lastly (I need to go to sleep... I'm tired), USE PARAGRAPH SPACING. I cannot emphasize this enough. Having no paragraph spacing makes the writing hard to read, and some people will want to just skip over it.

[A-Thousand-Lies]

I cannot agree with you more.

Then again, you have virtually discouraged me from ever contemplating writing a story here. Oh well.

[Kilrogg_Deadeye]

While I'm sure we all appriciate your efforts of critcism Warp, your comments aren't very useful. When writing a story it is entirely up to the write what goes in and what doesn't. Also, this board is occupied by amateure writers (at least I don't think anyone has had their work published. If so, I apologise), so don't expect J.R.R Tolkien or Jules Verne. People should be able to develope their writing skills here, learn new techniques, etc.

If you really want to contribute Warp you should comment on individual stories. Criticising all the stories on the whole board won't help.

[Inquisistor7]

Kilrogg, you have a good point. If warpblade does want to offer better criticism then he should offer advice in specific stories.

Now, warpblade, I don't think you are entirely without a basis for your accusations. Far from it, in fact, you might be right on several things. For example, having cultures be different is a good notion. Also, chracter development should be included in a chapter. Wiht that said, it is possible to develop a character in the battle context (which I am sure you realize and don't deny). As for the structural thinsg such as paragraphs, I agree completely. Finally, kilrogg is right when he says that this is a board of amteur writers (I know of at least two who are only 14), so please don't expect too much from everyone, but at the same time please offer your comments in specific threads.

[Ogrey-Author]

HEY, A RANT?! :y-mm:

I take great pride in my work with duels/battles that i write from time to time when i feel like it..i think. :y-idea:

[A-Thousand-Lies]

Inquisistor and Killrogg have re-encouraged me to write stories.

[Ogrey-Author]

Never seen you write one yet.

[BraveLiver]

@Warpblade: I don't have time to write long chapters, nor would I want to. 1 MS Word page is quite long enough, and personally, I wouldn't want to even READ something too much longer than that.

[A-Thousand-Lies]

I tried and I failed. Story of my life.

[Ogrey-Author]

No way, a decent chapter is at least two pages in microsoft word. Without spacing. If you are unable to read anything longer than a page.. the story isn't gripping enough.

[Flak]

I'm writing about the stories posted here.

First of all, a chapter shouldn't be about the length of one page in Microsoft Word. Double spaced. Far too many people write chapters that are far too short, and while they don't need to be thesis-length, there needs to be some level of depth to them. A chapter should be more than just a battle - it should include things such as character or storyline development.

Not necessarily. As one of our great writers who seems to be near forgotten says, there have been one word chapters. Magical Cow [GK]... anyone remember him? Anyhow, a good story/book has a balance, from 10 pages chapters to 1 page chapters. If a particular author writes a short-chapter style, well, then you can just think of them as a different form of installment and leave the word chapter out if it upsets you. For instance, take Braveliver (one of the posters with shorter chapters). I find his installments fun to read, and just the right length. Then, take Inquisistor7, I find his chapters fun to read, and just the right length. We get used to different forms in different places, and we accept that no one's the same style-wise.

Second, enough with the prophetic prologues. If it can be tied to story properly, then it works, but an all-too-common sight is a prophecy that has a bit to do with the story, but is never mentioned again.

Prophetic prologues are so fun though! *shrug*

Third, not every story needs to start with a battle. Some stories are written specifically about one battle - that's fine, but even in "Last Stand" (by Pureauthor), despite the setting of the battle for Mt. Hyjal, it starts with the time before the battle, and the author manages to include character development that is more thoughtfully done than the standard, "they were marching somewhere and suddenly lots of ______ attacked."

It's true, but just the fact that the Last Stand doesn't start with fighting is enough. If a few stories start with a battle, then they start with battles. If you object to that, you can read stories like the Last Stand, or, for example, my story ;-)

Fourth, every culture seems to be the same. A possible solution - try giving a little variety by giving different cultures various names for certain things. For example, when describing a Roman army, instead of saying "spears" and "throwing spears," one could say "hasta" and "pila." "Gladius" is far better than "short thrusting sword."

My story is rife with words of a language that don't exist. However, I disagree with your point here. Believe it or not, about half (or so) of the world's population won't know what those words mean. If you're just trying to
appeal to a broader audience, using words like that is not necessarily good.

Fifth - believe it or not, it IS possible for a female character to exist and not fall in love with one of the main characters.

I'm incapable of writing romance, and there are two (2) female characters in my story (with no romance around them, whooo).

Lastly (I need to go to sleep... I'm tired), USE PARAGRAPH SPACING. I cannot emphasize this enough. Having no paragraph spacing makes the writing hard to read, and some people will want to just skip over it.

That's just about the first criticism a new writer here gets, and I think they learn their lesson fast enough.

Kilrogg, you have a good point. If warpblade does want to offer better criticism then he should offer advice in specific stories.

Amen.

Finally, kilrogg is right when he says that this is a board of amteur writers (I know of at least two who are only 14), so please don't expect too much from everyone,

Don't lower your standards for me! :lol: I feel condescended upon.

[BraveLiver]

I got mentioned, and apparently I have a writing style. w00t!

[Forged Essence]

I have to say I think that the advice Warpblade is giving seems helpful...though that may only be because I'm not that good at writing.

PS- How do you put quotes in your posts?

[Shindog]

I agree that a lot of "chapters" get posted that are way too short to be actual chapters, but than every post doesn't have to be a complete chapter. If you think that a chapter is too long to post all at once, that's fine. But spliting it up into two post doesn't mean you need to split it up into two chapters. Chapters should indeed include some character development and major plot moving and if you need twenty post to do it, I say take the twenty posts to do it. Then call post 21 chapter two.

Point's two through five in Warpblade's rant were good advice. But like all advice, it needs to be taken with a grain of salt. Not every story needs a prophetic prolouge, true, but some do. Not every story should start with a battle, but some should.

The whole cultural words thing is good, but it require research time and resources that not everyone has. If you want to improve your writing, try to think of ways to make each culture in your stories appear different to the reader. Same goes for characters too.

Now to Inquisitor and Killrogg, don't take this the wrong way, but age and inexperience should never be an excuse. Writing is the equal parts skill, talent, effort, desire, maturity and experience. Notice age can only help with two of those and isn't even a requirment. Granted older writers will tend to have more mature and developed characters and stories but there will always be people older than you and the oldest is rarely the best (what am I saying? I think I'm the oldest on this board, anyway). I don't want any one here to think, "oh, I write better when I'm older." Try to write better now and you will.

[BraveLiver]

I have to say I think that the advice Warpblade is giving seems helpful...though that may only be because I'm not that good at writing.

PS- How do you put quotes in your posts?

Look at the post you want to quote, and then you wll see a small green button at the bottom right of it. Click that, and you have yourself a quote, otherwise...

Type [ QUOTE=postername ]actualquotehere[ /QUOTE ]
(remove spaces between squarebrackets

With that last thing, you can quote anything, for example

With that last thing, you can quote anything

Or you can have some fun, and go...

MOO!

[Warpblade]

I do remember Magical Cow, and each update wasn't a chapter, if I recall correctly. It was just part of a chapter.

Flak, in terms of the culture thing - stories can be well-written either way, but giving a more distinct culture (sure, I can understand if these things were explained the first time). But here's food for thought - why does everybody insist calling a Japanese curved, single-bladed sword a "katana"?

I'm not trying to discourage anybody here, but give a few pointers. I recently finished two of my finals, so I'll be more able to give individual reviews. My second and third are written more because I want more aspiring fan-fiction authors to deviate from certain cliches than anything else.

And no, I don't expect master writing here. (heck, I enjoyed Son of the Mountain King despite the fact that it was rife will spelling and grammatical errors and was awkwardly written, because it was very imaginative, and it had a nice depth when exploring the nerubian culture)

[Flak]

I do remember Magical Cow, and each update wasn't a chapter, if I recall correctly. It was just part of a chapter.

I wasn't referring to his stories, but to a book he referred to. And I am well aware that a post is not a chapter in some cases, as my chapters tend to be 2-3 posts long.

Flak, in terms of the culture thing - stories can be well-written either way, but giving a more distinct culture (sure, I can understand if these things were explained the first time). But here's food for thought - why does everybody insist calling a Japanese curved, single-bladed sword a "katana"?

Because American pop culture is obsessed with incorrect views of ninjas and samurai and think it's cool and then they...well,, you should know, you made a rant about American obsession with Japan.

[Inquisistor7]

Now to Inquisitor and Killrogg, don't take this the wrong way, but age and inexperience should never be an excuse. Writing is the equal parts skill, talent, effort, desire, maturity and experience. Notice age can only help with two of those and isn't even a requirment. Granted older writers will tend to have more mature and developed characters and stories but there will always be people older than you and the oldest is rarely the best (what am I saying? I think I'm the oldest on this board, anyway). I don't want any one here to think, "oh, I write better when I'm older." Try to write better now and you will.

I take no offense, and oyu are not incorrect. In no way at all am I trying to say that young authors shouldn't try to improve, rather, we should realize that some people are trying to write fiction for the first time and so we shouldn't grill them.

Warpblade: I am sure we would all appreciate more constructive criticism from you (since we all appreciate it when people respond to our writing (at least I do)).

[Flak]

Warpblade: I am sure we would all appreciate more constructive criticism from you (since we all appreciate it when people respond to our writing (at least I do)).

Amen. I too, appreciate critique.

[Shindog]

I take no offense, and oyu are not incorrect. In no way at all am I trying to say that young authors shouldn't try to improve, rather, we should realize that some people are trying to write fiction for the first time and so we shouldn't grill them.

Very true. You're completely right that we should encourage not discourage new writeres. I just warn against complacancy, that's all. I think for the most part, everyone here tries to be their best and help others to do the same.

[Kilrogg_Deadeye]

"I take no offense, and oyu are not incorrect. In no way at all am I trying to say that young authors shouldn't try to improve, rather, we should realize that some people are trying to write fiction for the first time and so we shouldn't grill them. "

Ay to that. I'm not trying to say young writer suck either, it's just that people are startes here and so not as good as they will be when they've written a lot and had time to develope their writing skills.

About the cultural thing, that will take lots of research, which you would do for a real book, but I don't think you should come to this board expecting it. This is after all a sort of...free-style writing thingy. We're practising, experimenting, trying out etc. And I find fantasy excellent to do that because I can invent anything I like without having to research this or that culture. Thus I focus more on technique than anything else. Of course, if people WANT to go into such details, by all means do so.