Problem

[lordshadowbane]

Ok theres this girl that I have a crush on and she knows it too and everytime she comes down to my street we see each other but for some reason I can never talk. wtf? I used to be able to talk to her last yr but now I feel like Im so tired. I cant make ppl laugh like I used to and I cant talk as much. WTF is wrong with me?

[Desert_Eagle25]

Stresses of life? Maturity? Growth? Nervousness? Ya never know.

[Kaptain]

It sounds like you're becoming more and more self-conscious just like every other teen. You fear that if you talk and say something stupid that people will react negatively to you. But make an effort to talk when you feel you normally wouldn't, eventually you'll get over it.

[End Dr. Phil mode]

[VirtualKish]

Kaptain's explanation is probably blatantly obvious with this girl you like. If you like her, you probably want to impress her, and hence, not make a fool out of yourself. Thus, talking to her would be a risk, and you're trying to play it safe.

[entropy orc]

Ok theres this girl that I have a crush on and she knows it too and everytime she comes down to my street we see each other but for some reason I can never talk. wtf? I used to be able to talk to her last yr but now I feel like Im so tired. I cant make ppl laugh like I used to and I cant talk as much. WTF is wrong with me?

It's cuz you are a loser who has no game. Otherwise, why would be posting in this forum about this ****?

[Desert_Eagle25]

entropy, lower the attitude. NOW.

[lordshadowbane]

For a second there I thought entropy was Surreal. I wouldve expected it too. Cant wait til DE gets mod powers back. And Entropy there is at least a dozen threads about this stuff. Thats why its called off-topic forum.
NE ways not talking was my first mistake so Im trying to fix it cuz she pities me from whut I heard.

[Warpblade]

That's not a good sign... it's bad to be pitied if you want to try to have a relationship. Unless she is a major exception, girls like to see confidence. From what I hear, pity-relationships generally end badly.

So basically, work on your confidence. I know it's hard, but you can do it.

[lordshadowbane]

lol thanx yea confidence is whut I lacked. But I used to be able to talk to her...

[disjuku]

hmm, just relax and be yourself, everyone will love you.

Thats my problem, way too self concious, it sucks, dont get caught like that - if you can relax, be happy with who/what you are and just enjoy yourself you will come accross much much better.

[lordshadowbane]

Lol what... O yea Im a chimp thats really smart and writing to you on my computer.

[Slay]

Problem

Solution.
-Slay

[DukeOfChaos]

I have 4 hints for you, I learned from these the hard way.
1) Never ask a girl out using e-mail.
2) Never ask a girl out during your math class.
3) Never ask a girl out on Valentines Day, this one I didnt learn from the first time.
4) Make sure she knows its coming; if she doesnt, you have to wait for an answer.

A few good things you can do to make it easier to talk to her
1) When she has a problem, either find the solution or be the solution.
2) Talking about something you have in common should always be your goal in a conversation.
3) Confidence is a gift, and I dont have it either.

[Gun50000]

Ok theres this girl that I have a crush on and she knows it too and everytime she comes down to my street we see each other but for some reason I can never talk. wtf? I used to be able to talk to her last yr but now I feel like Im so tired. I cant make ppl laugh like I used to and I cant talk as much. WTF is wrong with me?

Send me back two years ago, maybe even one, and I was in a similar situation.

[Bartuc the 1st]

You all seem to have a confidence problem,
if you want to say,it say it.
if you want to do it do it.

But be warned from Newton's Third Law every acction has an equal and opposite reaction

If you see her every day on the street go and talk to her
hang out with her and become friends so she trusts you more and more
flirt with her and show her your good side
do not be afraid of her or what she says

just one thing
FLIRTING IS THE LIMIT TILL YOU DATE
DO NOT COME ON TO HER NO MATTER WHAT UNLESS SHE BRINGS YOU INTO IT

I'm a "nice guy"
or "sweet"
or "cool"
as I have heard SOOOOO much it is sickining
I have never been pittied
alot of girls like me and flirt with me back but I know I would never get to date them.

That is my problem

you just need to be there for her and give her stuff somtimes
remember important stuff and until your ready do not ask her on a date
for atleast a month.
That is called moving too fast

Nothing much else you can do

[Gun50000]

Warning, pessimistic view ahead

Nothing much else you can do

I find there is absolutely nothing I can do, save anyone else. I find this stuff just sort of happens. No matter how many times I'm called "sweet" or a "nice guy" or any other compliment, things still don't get anywhere. Whether or not I have the confidence to do anything, it still won't change how she feels about me. I use myself not to draw away attention from the topic creator, but rather as a similar example.

Please disregard all that doesn't make sense. I have no clue what I just wrote.

[Bartuc the 1st]

I understood
getting called sweet and having confidence does s*** and in no way helps you "get the girl"?
well thats the jist right?
well
my problem is the same

were just too nice
eh why not ask one of the girl forumers wats wrong like KR

[Kijola]

Because asking KR would help shed light on something... hah.. KR, making things clearer.





But seriously, its a confidence issue, you have to believe, and by extension, make her believe, that you don't really care about getting her. You like her, but you don't need her.

We're too nice

There ya go, you said it. That is your problem.



Don't be needy, don't be clingy, and don't say "I love you" in the first months of the relationship. These things also apply to the "Tryin' to get the girl stage". Don't let her boss you around, don't suck up to her, be chivalrous but don't fall all over her and don't fawn over her. The reason you are "such a nice guy" or "such a sweet guy" is because you do **** like that.

You have to be interested in her, but not be her little puppy dog that does everything she asks and would jump off of a cliff for her... even if you would jump and want to do everything she asks.

If she sees that you will do this stuff, why would she date you when she knows she can get this kind of attention before you are even goin out...?

And the reason you can't talk to her is cause you are insecure about yourself and lack the confidence to believe that its possible she will like you. You have to not care if she likes you.

For full explanation of methods of getting females visit your local BlockBuster, or other video store, and rent my movie. The Tao of Steve.

[KaySeaGee]

Note that in that movie Steve is more of a conceptual person than an actual person, and is certainly not the person who posted above me.

[Kijola]

This is true, but I still is the Tao of Steve!

[Diskordjah]

I cant make ppl laugh like I used to and I cant talk as much. WTF is wrong with me?

eat more meat.


1) When she has a problem, either find the solution or be the solution.
2) Talking about something you have in common should always be your goal in a conversation.
3) Confidence is a gift, and I dont have it either.

1) no no no! girls just like to TALK about their problems! unless they specifically ask you to do something about em, just nod and be understanding! TRUST ME ON THIS ONE!!

L:"ooh I cant be with him cause he's a drugged up sociopath and my church would disapprove"
D:"then you gotta stop seein him, meetin n matin with him now and then will just make you feel worse"
L:"but I love him, I want to be with him!"
D:"then be with him and church be damned!"
L:"ooh I cant be with him cause he's a drugged up sociopath and my church would disapprove"

all right, in retrospect that was a "friend" conversation, and not one headin for romance. however, it still applies. unless its a simple and practical problem with no risk involved, just nod and be comforting, THEN STEER THE CONVERSATION AWAY AS QUICKLY AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE. if you got romantic interest in her that is. otherwise you'll fall in the "good friend trap".

sorry, that was my rant for today. too much fun has been lost through the friendtrap*.


*unless you're a sadistic SOB that likes to torment their relationship by making him insanely jealous of you while she insists that "we're just good friends".

[KaySeaGee]

How do women usually react if you grope them instead of shaking their hand when you first meet?

[Desert_Eagle25]

I was known as Mr. Doormat-Friend for nearly all of highschool and before.

Disko knows what he's talking about.

[Diskordjah]

How do women usually react if you grope them instead of shaking their hand when you first meet?

how should I know?


Mr DE, so was I. however, the plus is that those that landed you in the friendtrap will get new friends eventually that you can AVOID the trap with. I figure the ratio is about 1 trap to 3 new friends, and on the PLUS side the original female remembers your kindness which gives you an ally on the inside.

(I just ate (lots of meat) so my think-good skills are a bit garbled)

[The_Phiphler]

Gee, as strange as it might seem, im closing in on my 20th birthday, and I have NEVER been in love, wtf?? Evryone seems to be like "oh shes my 7th girl, shes not as good as the 5th" etc... I just think its weird.
(BTW, Im not a mofo, I have friends n stuff, so dont be a prik and say "HAHAHA YOU ASOCIAL NOOB")

[Desert_Eagle25]

So? It's all good. I'm 17, have had only 1 GF ever, and we're still going out, and plan to get married. I hear alot about my friends pimping it up and having 4-5 GF's at a time...I'm like.... "WTF?" O_o

[Aj Windshadow]

Im 17 too, mez no have GF's cause all good lokin ones are dumb and all smart ones are mediocre or ugly.....
Im begining to think i should have one just for sex and forget about her bieng able to match my intellectual prowress.
Anyone else think Disko is just an extremely cool guy !

[Bartuc the 1st]

I HATE that.
When some jackass is cheating on a very hot girl for another and they are both in the dark.
IT MAKES ME WANT TO BEAT THE LIVING HELL OUT OF THEM TILL THEY CRY AND APOLOGIZE TO BOTH AND LIVE A LIFE OF ABSTINENCE!!!
god I hate mean ppl.
pisses me off how people can be so ignorant and damn snug being an a**hole

That is why somtimes I feel like transforming into somekind of deamon and scaring the s*** out of them and engulf their souls with HellFire. :y-evil:

I may be violent but i'm not a jerk. :y-annoyed
so what your all saying is be an ass? :y-sad:

[Diskordjah]

meh, if you have a girlfriend, you shouldn't stray. aint honourable. sleeping around is the privilege of singles and other denizens of the romantic grey zone, the rest can go play monopoly or whatever.

[lordshadowbane]

Agh I could get one easily cuz theres a couple of girls who dig me n my friends keep buggin me to get a g/f but Im not gonna break some1's heart just so I so I wont be made fun of. Im not gonna hurt some1 to get a selfish gain. NE ways I cant ask her out cuz we never see each others except 1 second in the hallway so I to AIM her which failed...

[KaySeaGee]

So, hit and run is ralfwarg's way...

[lordshadowbane]

NE ways to increase self confidence. If so ne ways I can ask her out if I cant do it on AIM and I cant talk to her in person?

[Bartuc the 1st]

someone I like to be with and hang out with......
well there are 2 girls [currently] that are like that with me
a mexican girl named _______ and a kind of short but still hot girl named _______.
the spanish girl has a boyfriend......eh,I never would be able to hang out with her nor go out with her cause too many guys ask her out

the short girl........mabey but a friend of mine is gonna dump his girlfriend and I think he will date her...........ooooohhh the irony

the guy with a girlfriend always gets the girl instead of the sexy single guy.....lol

i don't see how he has any girl friends he's a lil.....ummm........this explaines it...
:y-crazy: :y-dunce: :y-wink3:
lol :lol:

[Diskordjah]

NE ways to increase self confidence. If so ne ways I can ask her out if I cant do it on AIM and I cant talk to her in person?

well, Im not sure what Night Elves has to do with anything, but I still think you should ask her out in person, cause thats what works best. (unless she's doin some *really* heavy flirting with you over AIM, such as inviting you over to pet her pussycat when you know she actually has a puppy dog(best spent sunday evening btw)).

Im sidetracking. see, communication is more than just words, 80-90% of it is non-verbal, ie the way you act when saying things. thats why you want to talk to her in person, not only because itll be a stronger message, but you'll see her reaction first hand. that, and doin this kind of business other than in person is kinda weak.

[BraveLiver]

Do NOT use e-mail!!! I cannot stress this enough! Two reasons:

#1. E-mail decreases your chance of getting the girl

#2. If you send it to the wrong person by accident, the results will be humorous to others but not to you (i.e accidently sending it to your dad).

[Bartuc the 1st]

like this? [going to his father]
-hey baby I love the way you rock my body and just wanted to ask if ya wanna make this official dating instead of wild random stuff like we been doing

-slay


lol :lol: just kidding slay we need to bring you down a notch closer to normal standards of coolness :y-thumbsu
like how i need a few thousand upgrades :y-wink2: :lol:

[KaySeaGee]

I'll hit and run you over with a cement mixer if you'd like me to.
You're probably enough of a wuss to stoop to that.

[Aj Windshadow]

I HATE that.
When some jackass is cheating on a very hot girl for another and they are both in the dark.
IT MAKES ME WANT TO BEAT THE LIVING HELL OUT OF THEM TILL THEY CRY AND APOLOGIZE TO BOTH AND LIVE A LIFE OF ABSTINENCE!!!
god I hate mean ppl.
pisses me off how people can be so ignorant and damn snug being an a**hole

That is why somtimes I feel like transforming into somekind of deamon and scaring the s*** out of them and engulf their souls with HellFire. :y-evil:

I may be violent but i'm not a jerk. :y-annoyed
so what your all saying is be an ass? :y-sad:

Who is it exactly that you are talking about???

[Kingcrazygenius]

He speaks of the incredible anger he feels when he hears of a guy who has a hot girl, but is cheating on her anyways.

[Nio the Namless]

I say make freinds with her first and move up from there. Ture, that this may make if difficult for her to consider you in a special way but it provides great foundation for further involvment in a relationship.

besides I think g/f and your best freind should be the same person

[perfectgamer911]

you need to gather all your confidence (I know its really hard but try) and just talk to her once at the street, just say hi and ask her how she's doing. And if you know her birthday send her a card, its also a good day to start talking, congratulate her and ask her what she got. but I'm not a real expert on this.

[Canadian Tire Money]

you need to love yourself before others can love you.

[Diskordjah]

Cliché, no good.
Stalker-ish, no good.
Cliché, no good.